Why do I let it bug me?

I know that when B says something negative about me and not his dad, that is because he trust me more, knows for sure that I will never leave him, that I will never turn my back on him, ect... But GOSH DANG IT, I am so tired of being the bad guy that gets all the freaking blame.

Last night in our weekly phone call, I got to hear how good B has been doing since his fathers visit up there. (such as it was, they stayed for 4 hours and that was it.) And then today I got a copy of one of his writing assignments about why he always chooses to quit instead of press on. One thing he said was "Another reason I quit is because nobody really cared if I quit, including teachers and sometimes my mom. He also said that his only punishment for quiting was getting grounded. WTH was I supposed to do, beat him? Then one thing that lead him to quit whatever it was that got him the assignment was that he was thinking about something that he and I talked about on the phone. I have no idea what it was, or really if it was good or bad, but again it seems like he is useing me as a excuse, and that could just be my hurt feelings from the reading that I didnt care.

So I talked to S and he said that its because he trust me to not leave if he upsets me, I talked to Joan at the school and she said the same thing. I try very hard not to be negative about Bs dad, but it is SOOO hard when I sit and see all the things I have done to help B, and his father just sits back on the sidelines and takes credit and glory for everything I do, yet if it doesnt go right I am the first to get blamed. Joan agrees with me that B's dad is trying as hard as he can to get out of going to the student/parent workshops. But the joke is on B's dad, the August workshop that he cant make it to except on Sunday to go visit, they are going to do a special workshop for B and his dad that day!!!!

Oh he is doing better in school now to. The Focalin (sp) and Risperdal (sp) seem to be a good combo. His grades are going back up and he is working harder on stuff instead of sleeping at his desk and not doing his work. He has also stopped cussing at staff. He is cussing more at the other students, but well that is normal for a bunch of teenage boys. Joan also told me that while he is a big handful, certainly not the easiest boy they have had there he definatly is not the hardest case they have had either.